I didn’t get a chance to mention that I am visiting on EWTN’s Women of Grace this week. Each day it airs at 11:00 AM ET and 11:30 PM ET. I hope you can tune in.
We are discussing my memoir The Kiss of Jesus and the twists and turns of my life and how they helped to shape my life.
“I am that man that you mentioned in your life…”
What was that? How could he be?
Allow me to back up a bit to explain…
When I wrote my book The Kiss of Jesus: How Mother Teresa and The Saints Helped Me To Discover The Beauty of The Cross I deeply desired to offer a huge dose of hope to those who had suffered from any form of abuse or have suffered in some way. I had learned along the way that it is important to share about our struggles and God’s redeeming grace so that others could be helped. I wanted to share the power of prayer and God’s grace, especially in the dark corners of life.
As well, I hoped to get across the need to forgive. I figured that though my memoir was written for men and women, that perhaps the majority of the people my book would most likely impact would be women. Since the release of my memoir, I have heard from countless women who have thanked me and told me that they were changed for the better by reading The Kiss of Jesus. I was not looking for thanks but I am praising God for His mercy and love and for working through me to help others. I am deeply thankful.
But, I never expected to hear from an eighty five year old man who recently wrote me a letter.
“I am that man that you mentioned in your life…”
I had to stop and think…
I read further through a bit of shaky writing and then realized that this man had seen me on EWTN talking about my life, struggles and suffering. He had recognized himself in my story.
Wow. His letter was extremely powerful for me to read. My heart was deeply touched as I continued to read his words. He explained that after watching me on EWTN he knew that he needed to ask God to help him and to also forgive him. The man thanked me for helping him to find “peace and serenity” now at eighty five years old.
He wrote so much more and ended his letter by thanking me for my “suffering…” He said, “Now, I know what my wife went through.”
Oh, dear God, please continue to help this man and anyone who has suffered or is suffering. Please grant them the graces they need to forgive and to be forgiven. Thank you dear Lord for your LOVE. Amen.
This Bookmark episode (above) was filmed last summer at the Catholic Marketing network and is comprised of two segments. I am in the second segment. You can scroll the little marker to the halfway point or watch the whole show. Below, I am standing with EWTN’s Bookmark Host and my good friend Doug Keck after filming our program.
You can click on the book cover image to see more about the book as well as ordering information at my “book” page.
You can also view the show here on EWTN’s YouTube page and here at the EWTN Bookmark web page.
Enjoy the show and please share it with your friends and family.
Years ago when I found out that I had osteoporosis I committed to get out there every day and get some walking in. Walking is supposed to help create bone mass. I think the walking has helped me.
More recently, I have gotten my husband involved in exercise. I have long known that it would be good for him, but he has resisted the idea for some time now. But over the last few weeks I have enjoyed having a hiking buddy. Yes, I talked him into it! So, every morning, we take a hike. I say it’s a hike and not a walk, because it isn’t just a casual stroll on a level track or sidewalk. We live in the woods of rural Connecticut and there are a couple of dirt roads near our home. There are some decent hills along our route, so, whether we just hike a mile or have time to do our two mile hike to the farm and back, we get a pretty good work out (for old people!).
It has been hot an humid lately and in order to get that hike into our day, we have to do it first thing in the morning before it gets worse as the day unfolds, weather permitting, of course. When I say “weather permitting,” I don’t mean that we don’t go if it’s hot and sticky (and who in their right mind would want to go out and hike in those conditions?). We push ourselves and go out. But, if it’s pouring rain or thunder-storming, we skip it that morning. Thankfully, we very rarely need to worry about tornadoes in these parts.
I use an herbal bug repellant since I am still dealing with tick borne diseases and don’t want to get any more. I had four active ones (Lyme, Q 
Fever, Anaplasma, and Babisia) for quite some time. The doctor and I are hoping that I might have just very recently defeated two of them–finally. We are not totally sure until we get results from another round of blood work. But we are hoping. I have been dealing with Lyme disease for over twenty five years now, with five different documented new cases of Lyme. I guess you can say that I have been a “Tick magnet.” I wish that weren’t so, but alas, it is. So, I deal with it, fight it, and have pretty good stuff to offer up to God.
Adding a Rosary to the mix
So, each morning my husband and I get up and get dressed quickly. After putting organic tick spray on ourselves, we head out the door–me with rosary in hand (my husband follows along with or without his beads). I love to pray the rosary first thing in the morning. Well, my Morning Offering comes first before I leave the house. But, if I don’t get my rosary prayed first thing, I might not get to it. It might be said in bits and pieces–a decade at a time. And, I don’t think that is so bad. Our dear Mother Mary knows that we are busy at the service of others. I often preach to others that even a decade at a time is okay. Many times those kinds of rosaries are prayed on my finger tips as I trudge (or run!) through my day. But, there is nothing worse for me than getting to the end of the day and lamenting that my rosary was not said and I am so exhausted by then to complete the whole rosary. Oy vey!
If I can pray my rosary in the morning before getting into all of the hustle and bustle of the day, I feel much better, knowing thatI have answered the Blessed Mother’s call to us through her messages at Fatima. She called for the rosary to be prayed daily for peace in the world and the conversion of sinners. Every rosary gives us the opportunity to offer all of our family and loved ones to God through those simple yet powerful beads. Mary takes our prayer offerings into her loving Immaculate Heart where they become extraordinarily beautiful, and she then delivers the prayers to heaven–truly amazing!
So, I am delighted that I have gotten my husband out the door and exercising with me every morning, as well as getting a whole rosary in before he leaves for work and before I settle down at my computer to get going on mine. Then, as the day unfolds, I can add to that rosary and pray additional decades.
Crosses in our lives
This morning when out on our rosary hike, I discovered this beautiful cross on the side of the dirt road. It is a perfect cross made out of God’s creation. It was yet another reminder to me about Our Lord’s holy Cross and great love for us.
Earlier this month when I was weeding a little garden out back, I tossed some weeds and old stalks of plants on to the ground nearby. Afterwards when I was cleaning that up, I discovered that two of the pieces of stalks had landed to form a perfect cross. Pretty amazing, I thought. I believe that God is forever speaking to us through His creation. We need to have eyes to see and ears to hear.
Not too long ago, I felt inspired one morning to put the message out there to the world about forgiveness, love, and mercy, and the Cross of Jesus. I wrote a short blog post titled “Was it something he said?” In it I asked:
How often do we hold a grudge without even realizing it? A co-worker is in a bad mood and takes something out on you. It seems crazy and totally out of the blue–you were simply an innocent bystander. Someone makes a snide remark in a passive aggressive kind of way. Your husband is short with you. Or, he seems ungrateful for the countless things you do for him. Your mother-in-law just does not understand your mothering style–and she has voiced her opinion about that—on more than one occasion. Sound familiar? And the list goes on and on–little pin pricks actually hurt a lot. Little splinters from the Cross?
Love hurts too. Mother Teresa often said that to love authentically should cost us. Real love hurts, she explained. Is it possible to take the high road when attacked? Let love and prayer deflect that arrow to the heart? Jesus said, “Love your enemies. And pray for those who persecute” (Matthew 5:44)….
You can read the whole thing here. It was the kind of post in which readers did not leave comments because of the nature of the message. But instead, they contacted me privately to tell me how much it touched their heart and that they really needed to see it because they had issues brewing and wanted to be able to forgive.
With her permission I will share one woman’s reaction to the post:
My week got a bit sour on Tuesday when I returned to work! I was feeling down and I just read your blog post ‘Is it something he said?’ It just nailed it and gave me a lot of peace and solace…. I knew I was harboring un-forgiveness and that was the main reason for the dark spot in my heart….. last evening the Holy Spirit really convicted me and I asked God to forgive me and I felt better. Your blog article was like an extra aide to my heart which God has already started mending….After reading it, I went for walk (its lunch time down under!) went to the nearby park….. prayed the Rosary while walking and came back and spoke to the person who hurt me and made me feel small.. Now, my heart is so much lighter. Praise God.
Yes, praise God!
In my memoir The Kiss of Jesus: How Mother Teresa and The Saints Helped Me To Discover The Beauty of The Cross when talking about opportunities for grace that might be a bit difficult, I said:
The irritable, the angst-ridden, and the contradictory–those family members and neighbors who challenge us in some way–actually help us on our way to heaven. We need to ask God for grace and an extra dose of faith, hope, and charity to be able to love the very people God wants us to serve. We are actually called to love them to heaven! In the course of even just one day, God gives many opportunities to act on grace, to love our family members and others near us, to set an example by our selfless service to them. It’s not always easy; in fact, most times it is very difficult.
Dear Lord, please open our eyes and our hearts to see you in our family member, our neighbor, co-worker, and everyone you have put in our midst. Please grant us the graces to always act in love to serve them and bring them closer to You. Blessed Mother Mary, please guide and protect us, and help us to be attentive to your graces in our lives. All of the Angels and Saints, please pray for us. Amen.
How often do we hold a grudge without even realizing it? A co-worker is in a bad mood and takes something out on you. It seems crazy and totally out of the blue–you were simply an innocent bystander. Someone makes a snide remark in a passive aggressive kind of way. Your husband is short with you. Or, he seems ungrateful for the countless things you do for him. Your mother-in-law just does not understand your mothering style–and she has voiced her opinion about that—on more than one occasion. Sound familiar? And the list goes on and on–little pin pricks actually hurt a lot. Little splinters from the Cross?
Love hurts too. Mother Teresa often said that to love authentically should cost us. Real love hurts, she explained. Is it possible to take the high road when attacked? Let love and prayer deflect that arrow to the heart? Jesus said, “Love your enemies. And pray for those who persecute” (Matthew 5:44).
Have you felt hurt at a deep level? Do you wonder why you can’t sleep well or feel any peace after an argument or misunderstanding? Are you angry? Did you forgive and let it go? Can you? Are you hanging onto the pain and hurt for dear life because—well, because only God knows why! It’s stupid when you think about it. You are letting the slight pin prick or even deeper affliction fester and even get infected–with pride and anger, and even rebellion. Yes, rebellion, because you are refusing to forgive and let go of it. What is that doing to your heart and soul? Do you want to let the evil one rob you of peace and all of the amazing life-sustaining graces that await you when you forgive and let go? Jesus said, “Forgive and you will be forgiven” (Luke 6:37).
Saint Faustina said, “He who knows how to forgive prepares for himself many graces from God. As often as I look upon the cross, so often will I forgive with all my heart.”
Let’s do just that. Let’s meditate on the Passion of Christ—like St. Faustina, gaze upon the Crucifix and pray for the graces to forgive. God’s love through us can miraculously heal hearts and soothe the savage beast. Think about it. It’s not a coincidence that we are in the situations we find ourselves in. We need to grow in holiness. God gives us plenty of opportunities. Why not do something countercultural and choose not to react negatively when wronged by another? Why not instead, take it immediately to prayer? Go a step further and smile at that person—yes, smile.
Christ’s abiding peace and amazing graces are waiting.
There’s a brand new dust jacket for my upcoming memoir: THE KISS OF JESUS! Click on the image below to enlarge it for easier viewing.
New description of the book on the dust jacket:
Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle is a Catholic author, a radio and television host, and an inspirational speaker known and admired from coast to coast. Yet with all of her public exposure, she has revealed very little about her personal history, that is, until now. When she discovered that sharing her struggles gives encouragement to others, she was persuaded to write this story of her life.
Growing up in a Polish-American Catholic family, Donna-Marie was blessed with hard-working parents who provided a stable home for their eight children. At times her childhood was golden and carefree, but other times it was tarnished by pain that she felt was best left unspoken as she sought God for help and strength.
After she left home after high school, her path took some harrowing turns. A Vietnam veteran fiancé snapped and held her against her will. She suffered pregnancy loss, serious illness, divorce, and single motherhood. Perhaps her greatest trial was an epic custody battle in which she needed to defend both her reputation as a mother and the safety of her five children.
Yet through all the dark valleys, Donna-Marie kept the fire of her faith burning. Helping her to see the beauty of the crosses in her life, and to rely on the presence and the providence of God, were saintly souls who became her friends and mentors. One of these was Blessed Mother Teresa, who was her confidant and spiritual mother for ten years.
Pre-order your autographed copy (on sale!) here.
What do you think?
There are so many reasons that Christ’s Cross should be on our minds as a Christian, especially because we are navigating the season of Lent—that beautiful and prayerful time of year. Holy Mother Church prods us to become more mindful of Jesus’ Passion and Death on the Cross—His unselfish holy sacrifice so that we might have Eternal Life…
I recently wrote about the Cross using a couple of very beautiful stories about the Cross in the lives of two friends. You can read it here.
